Now this is the tale of young Freddie Bloor
whose sexual equipment got jammed in the door.
By the time they freed him, he didn't feel well
for his private parts were mangled to hell.
They rushed him to hospital
the ambulance flew! but when they arrived
there was nowt they could do.
What a sad blow for fred, condemned without choice
to a life with no sex and a high squeaky voice.

But lucky for Fred, so he wouldn't feel a fool
some bright spark suggested a bionic tool.
A bright new electric one made out of brass,
though the batteries would have to be kept up his arse..

So newly equipped and after a rest
Fred decided to put his new tool to the test.
He grabbed him a girl, the nearest one handy,
piled her with drink and made her feel randy.
The girl without waiting put her hand in his flies,
when she felt what was there gave a cry of surprise.
"That's my bionic chopper, now lets have some fun",
"Cor blimey" she said "it feels like a gun".

They both stripped off quick and Fred entered her fast
and turned up the speed knob and gave her full blast.
They clutched tight to each other as Fred's dick shook for more,
then they rolled off the bed and onto the floor.

Now the part hotted up and they started to choke
as the air in the room became filled with blue smoke.
With a bang Fred's left bollock shot up in the air
and the other went plonkety plonk down the stair.

So back for repair went poor Fred, full of woe,
was this how his sex life was destined to go?
A return to the doctor at the end of each shag
with his prick in his pocket and his balls in a bag.

But they fixed young Fred up, made him manly again
and helped out the batteries with a flex for the main.
So if he can't get a girl, now lucky fred doesn't cry
cause hes AC/DC and can go with a guy.