Beginners Guide to Computer Language BIT : A word used to describe computers,as in 'Our son's computer cost quite a bit ' BOOT : What your friends give you because you spend too much time bragging about your computer skills BUG : What your eyes do after you stare at the tiny green computer screen for more than 15 minutes. Also: what computer magazine do to you after they get your name on their mailing list CHIP : The fattening, non-nutritional food computer users eat to avoid having to leave their keyboard for meals COPY : What you have to do during school tests because you spend too much time at the computer and not enough time studying CURSOR : What you turn into when you can't get your computer to perform, as in "You $#%&%$#%$% computer!" DISK : What goes out in your back after bending over a computer keyboard for seven hours at a clip DUMP : The place all your former hobbies wind up soon after you install your computer ERROR : What you made the first time you walked into a computer showroom to 'just look' EXPANSION UNIT : The new room you have to build on to your home to house your computer and all its peripherials FILE : What your secretary can now do to her nails six and a half hours a day, now that the computer does her day's work in 30 minutes FLOPPY : The condition of a constant computer user's stomach due to lack of exercise and a steady diet junk food ( see "Chips" ) HARWARE : Tools,such as lawnmowers,rakes and other heavy equipment you haven't laid a fingeron since getting your computer IBM : The kind of missile your family members and friends would like to drop on your computers so you'll pay attention to them again MENU : What you'll never see again after buying a computer because you'll be too poor to eat in a restaurant MONITOR : Often thought to be a word associated with computers,this word actually refers to those obnoxious kids who always want to see your hall pass at school PROGRAMS : Those things you used to look at on your television before you hooked your computer up to it RAM : What you do to the side of your computer when it's not working properly RETURN : What lots of people do with their computers after only a week and a half TERMINAL : A place where you can find buses,trains and really good deals on hot computers WINDOW : What you heave the computer out of after you accidentally erase a program that took you three days to set up ( With courtesy of Alfred.E.Neumann )