FOR THE INFORMATION OF ALL EMPLOYEES

Date: April 1, 1990
SUBJECT:	Additional Training

IT is now, and always has been the policy of this company to assure its
employees that they are well trained.  Through our Special High Intensity
Training (SHIT) program, we have given our employees more SHIT than other
companies in this area.

If any employee feels that he or she does not receive enough SHIT on the job,
or that he or she could advance to another position by taking more SHIT,
please see your immediate supervisor.

Our Management people are specially trained to assure you that you will get
all the SHIT you can stand.

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EMPLOYEES ALSO NOTE:

If you graduate to the top of our list taking all the SHIT that is given
to you, you may then qualify for our Supervisors program known as:
Complete Responsibility Action Position (CRAP).

See... you to can be a member of Management .. Simply take all the SHIT
you can and you can look forward to the additional CRAP when you reach
the top.

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Any employee who has the initiative and the drive to take both SHIT and CRAP
can count on becoming one of the elite.

Our company is offering, for a limited time only, the chance for you, the
common employees, to try for Advanced Supervisory Staff Helping Our Loyal 
Employees (ASSHOLE).

So work hard and you will find that the more SHIT you take and the more
CRAP you can handle qualifies you as an ASSHOLE for sure.